Being Nice Isn’t Strategic

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Hey CS Pro,

Let’s be real, if “being nice” is your strategy for building customer relationships, you’re doing it wrong.

Here’s what’s actually working right now.

Let’s Talk About What Actually Builds Trust

I’ve been in your shoes. Juggling dozens of accounts, jumping from onboarding calls to escalations to QBR prep, and trying to squeeze in a quick check-in email in between.

But here’s the thing I had to learn the hard way.

Your customers don’t need another Zoom call. They need a strategic partner.

Too many CSMs are operating like robots, repeating the same updates, replying to tickets, sending out mass product announcements. That’s not Customer Success. That’s customer support on autopilot.

In today’s AI-driven world, the one thing that will actually set you apart is your ability to be human. To build real relationships that make your customer want to stay with you, not just your product.

Because the product isn’t the glue.

The relationship is.

Today’s newsletter will break down how to build strategic relationships with all your customers.

But first, today’s sponsor

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The 3 Mistakes I See Most CSMs Still Making

1. Thinking that being “nice” is enough

I hate to say it, but your kindness alone isn’t enough to win upsells or renewals.

Your customers don’t need a friend. They need a guide.

Yes, be kind. But don’t stop there.

Be useful. Be strategic. Be the person they turn to when things get tough or when they’re trying to unlock that next level of success.

2. Only reaching out when YOU need something

Sending a message right before a renewal or asking for a favor when you haven’t provided any value in months? That’s not a relationship. That’s a transaction.

Start thinking about their world instead of yours.

If there’s a re-org, a new hire, or layoffs, those are your moments to show up. That’s when your support actually matters.

3. Using the same messaging for every customer

Generic check-ins, copy-paste emails, mass feature announcements…none of that feels strategic.

If your customer reads your message and thinks, “This could’ve been for anyone,” then you’ve missed the mark.

Start tailoring your outreach to what actually matters to them.

How I Coach CSMs to Build Strategic Relationships That Stick

Inside RevUp Academy, I teach a relationship-building approach rooted in three key habits:

1. Be relevant, not just responsive

If all you’re doing is replying to what your customer asks for, you’re just being reactive.

Instead, look for patterns. What are customers asking for at specific milestones? Predict it. Anticipate it. And reach out before they need it.

For example, if I know customers usually ask how to add new users by week 3, I’ll send them a tailored guide in week 2 with their use case in mind. That’s relevant. That’s value.

2. Show up with consistency, not intensity

You don’t need to do everything in one big call or one massive recap email.

Instead, build the habit of regular, meaningful touchpoints.

• Send reminders, not just recaps

• Congratulate them on internal promotions

• Follow up on things they care about, even outside your product

It’s like watering a plant. One big bucket of water once a quarter won’t cut it. Small, consistent moments are what make things grow.

3. Make it human

This one’s the most important. I know we’re all leaning into AI and automation, and that’s great for scale. But the human element is non-negotiable.

Use their name. Celebrate their wins. Ask about their goals beyond the platform.

When you show up as a person, not a vendor, that’s when they start to trust you.

Takeaways

1. Stop defaulting to “being nice.”

Kindness is expected. Strategic value builds trust.

2. Anticipate before they ask.

If you know what’s coming, you can deliver value before they even realize they need it.

3. Be consistent and human.

Don’t overdo it. Just be thoughtful, regular, and real.

This solo episode is packed with real stories and tactical plays that I use every day, and coach on inside RevUp.

Have a listen to the latest podcast:

Enjoyed this week’s newsletter?

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Thank you for being part of this journey!

That's all for now.

If you have any questions or suggestions, please feel free to contact us.

Cheers to your CS success,

Anika

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